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Friday, November 23, 2007

Things I have learned lately

Although I cant say "lately". Its more like things that keep coming up again and again I guess and proving themselves

Like you cant be happy for someone else unless you are happy yourself. I find this to be so true. I genuinely cant be happy for someone when I am totally miserable. I actually feel like dam, why dont they just shut up and die already. Then I find when I am happy and in my right mind, I am so happy for someone else I could cry as if it happened to me

You really can love and hate someone at the same time. I dont know what I would do without Anthony at some times and then at others, GAWD how I hate him. I pray so hard each time he leaves the house that he just have a car accident and die, then I start crying and praying that nothing happens to him and we live to 100 spending each day together.

I have learned that you really can NOT like your own children. You can love them, die for them and not like them as individual people. I dont find this is something one will go to hell over. I just think all people are different and not all get along. Just because you gave birth to them makes it no different

I have watch friend after friend go through this period. Then I finally went through it myself. I really do not like AJ as a person. If I were to just meet him, I would not want to spend any time with him. He is rude to all his friends, very selfish, treats people badly , even his own two year old little brother and doesnt seem to care. He will try to twist a kittens head off and think its ok. I just do not like him as a person.

Its just so much weird things that are coming to my mind lately and all at once. I had no idea that you can go through 100 emotions all in a 10 minute period. I am not sure I am going through this because I am so ill again and thinking so obscurely from lack of sleep or what.

Well just thought I would share the weird stuff in my head today

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